This Is Part of the Process

Dear Jesus 

 Is this part of my journey? Medication trials?  Why does it have to be this way, trial and error to find what works for our brains?   It saddens my heart knowing this, knowing the process, the side effects that people go through, your people go through just to seek some help.  You see, the brain is an organ, and if it needs a little boost, then it's okay; it's not to replace your counsel. No, Lord, you come first above it all. 

I seek you, Lord; I truly do. I come to you. I open my Word daily. I read a book in the Bible. I read a chapter a day, Lord, I highlight what resonates; I am consistent, Lord, I am.  You have not failed me, Lord. I am a believer.

 I am aware that my brain needs some help; that my nervous system has been dysregulated for years, and now I am seeking the help it needs so it can silence the noise. lord, the rewiring can become more consistent, the knowing you move, and being more consistent in my life overall with those around me, Lord.  

Lord, I just want to say that this battle, I battle this trial, this weight of anxiety that surfaced in the moment of the treatment just scared me, Lord,d but you know who is strong. I am Lord because you didn't give me a spirit of fear, you didnt so I will move forward one step at a time. Anxiety doesn't have a hold on me, it doesn't. Depression doesn't have a hold on me, it doesn't. This is part of the process in finding the right medication. This is just withdrawals of the medication; this isn't who I am in Christ, who I am.